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Post by shian on Jun 8, 2008 15:50:46 GMT -5
::She froze for an instant when she felt Brock's body involuntarily jerk itself awake, then relaxed a bit when she felt him relax also, feeling his face at her shoulder.::
::She allowed herself a small smile, though her heart was pounding with anxiety.::
Good morning. ::Her voice was quiet, yet audible.::
::She turned so that she was looking at him without twisting her entire neck around.::
::She once again resumed her task of studying him. Every line and curve and angle of his face needed to be committed to memory. She needed to feel completely comfortable with him and remembering his exact features was helping with that.::
::Her heart was still beating fast and her stomach muscles were clenched up with tension. Being this close to someone was something she was no longer accustomed to. But she tried to calm her mind and get her body to follow. This was her husband, after all.::
How did you sleep?
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Post by Fleet Captain Brock Dantara on Jun 8, 2008 16:23:35 GMT -5
::Brock had almost forgotten just how nice it felt to wake up next to his wife.::
::As he shook the cobwebs off, he heard her speak. Almost as if she were speaking out of the waking dream.
Her voice reflecting off the darkness with a soft clarity like some celestial Madonna. Every word like a pebble reflecting as it hit the dark water.::
::He sat up, and slowly leaned over to kiss her cheek just as he always used to do first thing in the morning.::
I think I slept great. ::He smiled:: I think that was the best night's sleep I've had a in a long, long time.
How about you? ::He looked deep into her eyes as She did his.::
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Post by shian on Jun 8, 2008 17:13:21 GMT -5
::Shian felt a little nervous, as she saw him begin to lean towards her to kiss her cheek. She tried not to steel herself against it, but wasn't sure if she'd managed it or not.::
::It was something she was used to before. But now... well, now she had to get used to everything again.::
::She gave him a smile, enjoying the comfort she felt in hearing his voice and seeing his eyes.::
Well, I didn't have as restless a sleep as I've been having.
::Her nightmares and flashes of things that had happened usually made her toss and turn instead of sleeping peacefully. But she could honestly not recall having any nightmares last night. Maybe that was a significant event.::
::She looked at him, with love, but still from afar, it seemed.::
Thank you for holding me. I think that may have helped.
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Post by Fleet Captain Brock Dantara on Jun 8, 2008 20:26:09 GMT -5
I'm glad you got some better sleep than usual. I think that's a good sign.
As far as holding you, you don't have to thank me for that. ::He smiled:: I'm your husband. It's part of the package.
::He wanted to tell her what had really hurt him, and what was really haunting him. But now was the time to take care of Shian. His issues would come later.::
Sweetheart.... ::he began:: I can get breakfast when ever you want. I just wondered if mybe you'd like to walk with me to the messhall. It isn't far, and if you don't want to, that's perfectly alright.
I just thought that maybe getting out and getting a little change of scenery might be good. I'll be with you the whole time. I won't leave your side for a second.
It's just a suggestion. You don't have to do anything you don't want.
::He had hoped he was doing the right thing. maybe just a baby step like this would be a good thing.::
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Post by shian on Jun 8, 2008 20:53:57 GMT -5
::Shian curled up a little more, listening to Brock's proposition. She thought about it. What would she feel like if she had to see people she didn't know or trust? Would she have an anxiety attack?::
::The doctors on SB 173 did want her to start working herself back into society. They felt it was time for her to do so. Maybe Brock was right. Maybe a change of scenery would be good.::
A-alright ::she said hesitantly:: As long as you're with me the whole time.
::She really wanted to add that she wanted to be able to scan everyone they would run into, but that probably wouldn't look very good for a Captain to be walking around with an overly paranoid wife.::
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Post by Fleet Captain Brock Dantara on Jun 10, 2008 20:01:19 GMT -5
::He stood up and took aher hand to lead her out.::
I won't leave your side for a minute. I have my own special little table Where I usually sit and eat quietly. The crew knows better than to disturb the Captain at mealtime unless it's a red alert.
::He smiled at they left the Quarters.::
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Post by shian on Jun 11, 2008 8:48:35 GMT -5
::She took his hand, lightly, though his grip was stronger. She'd only been on this ship for a day, and she was already leaving the one place she'd been. The thought was nearly terrifying to her at the moment. But, she knew that she needed this move forward to get back what it was she'd somehow lost, or was forced to lose.::
::She looked around at the walls in the hallway once the doors to the quarters closed behind them, subconsciously moving closer to Brock as they walked.::
So, where exactly is the messhall?
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Post by Fleet Captain Brock Dantara on Jun 12, 2008 9:51:40 GMT -5
::They began to walk down the corridor toward the turbolift. Crewmen nodded and smiles as they walked by, going about their business. None of the crew, of course knew thae particulars of what was going on, only that the Captain's wife had been through some kind of trauma.::We're on deck eight. ::Brock said:: We're only going to one of the messhalls on deck eleven. I have a quiet little table in the corner there. I like to eat alone, ususally during duty hours but I also think it's importand that a Captain be in plain sight of his crew, not section himself off.::They entered the TL.:: Deck eleven. ::Brock said::****Continues in "Messhall"*****
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Post by shian on Jun 24, 2008 8:38:37 GMT -5
::Shian avoided eye contact with everyone else that they passed as they got into the turbolift to go back to deck eight.::
I'll see if I'm hungry when lunchtime comes. You're coming back to quarters for lunch, right?
::She looked at him hopefully.::
When you come back, you could bring something with you. Whatever you want. I'd be alright with that.
::As they reached deck eight and stepped off the turbolift, she was more anxious again. Now, she just wanted to get back to quarters and see Dr. McCoy. Her head was swimming with emotions. And they seemed to become more jumbled up more when she looked at her husband. Not in a bad way, but just... jumbled. She knew the way it should be, the way she should want it to be. She just needed to figure out how to get there.::
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Post by Fleet Captain Brock Dantara on Jun 25, 2008 20:45:01 GMT -5
::They had arrived back at their quarters. Brock went in to brush his teeth again and wash up a little. He didn't want to be accused of "Troglyte breath" on his own bridge.::
Of course. I'll stop and pick us up a little picnic lunch on the way back from the bridge. I'll be here to join you for lunch, unless it's a red alert or something. ::He smiled::
::Before he could even speak, his commbadge went off::
"McCoy here. Just letting you know I'm on my way."
Well, ::He said:: Impeccapble timing. You'll be fine for a couple minutes until the Doctor gets here. I'd wait, but I have a communication coming in from Admiral helm, so I need to be in my Ready Room When it comes in.
::He kissed her on the cheek::
I'll call down and see how you're doing every so often, Ok?
::He stroked her hair, then started for the door. he could have sat and waited for the Doctor, but a few minutes a lone each day, or every other, may help her make some progress. As much as he wanted to, he knew that babying her too much would be counter productive.::
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Post by shian on Jun 25, 2008 21:00:46 GMT -5
::Shian smiled and nodded to Brock. But the smile was almost empty. His kiss on her cheek had nearly startled her, and she was lost at the moment for how she should react.::
Alright.
::That was the only thing she could think of to say. She watched him walk out the door of the quarters, then watched as the doors slid shut. She looked around the room.::
::It was quiet. She was alone.::
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Post by shian on Jun 25, 2008 21:07:47 GMT -5
Shian Taris: ::Shian walked over to the desk in the main room of the quarters and tapped the comm button:: Dr. McCoy? Dr McCoy EMH: ::As She called over the Comm, McCoy had just come to the door, and rang the buzzer.::Shian Taris: ::she walked over to the door, checking the visual to see who it was. She unlocked the security codes and allowed the doors to open:: That was quick. Come in, please.Dr McCoy EMH: ::He smiled as he entered.:: Always try to be punctual. Besides. there are certain thing I don't have to do in the mornings anymore. Saves a lot of time. ::Grins, as he takes out his tricorder::Shian Taris: ::She didn't quite know how to respond to that, but she gave a smile, as she turned to secure the door again::Dr McCoy EMH: ::Nods:: Readings look about right from what I've gone over. Metabolic functions are good, temperature, respiration. Ok. So tell me how you're feeling right now.Shian Taris: ::Then, turning to face him, she offered for him to sit down:: Well, I guess I'm feeling alright. A little anxious about things. ::she wrung her hands together for a moment::Dr McCoy EMH: Well, of course. that's to be expected. I know this is not easy for you, Shian. But we're just going to take small steps and beat this thing little by little. ::Thinks for a moment::Dr McCoy EMH: Brock tells me you're one hell of a helmsman. says you took your old ship through the wormhole at warp. That had to have taken some nerve. Even old Jim would have winced at that one. ::Smiles::Shian Taris: ::sits on the edge of a chair, listening to him:: I don't know about how good I am anymore.::she chuckled nervously::Dr McCoy EMH: Seems to me, if you had the gumption to do that, you can get through about anything. And from what I hear, once you're back behind the controls, it's like riding a bicycle.Dr McCoy EMH: By the way, I was glad to see that you came out of the quarters a little to have Breakfast with Brock. How was that?Shian Taris: I -- I just don't think I'm ready for that just yet. It took a lot for me to even want to leave here this morning. Even if I knew it was something I should enjoy. ::sighs:: I tried to enjoy it.Dr McCoy EMH: I wasn't suggesting that you go flying right away. I was just making an example. Ok, so tell me how you're feeling about all this, and if you're ready, Maybe you'd like to talk a little about what happened to you out there.Dr McCoy EMH: Whatever you want to talk about is up to you. Just relax and take your time.Shian Taris: Did you see Dr. Parvi's notes? I mean, how much do you know about what happened?Dr McCoy EMH: Well, According to my information, You were given psychotropic drugs, to alter your mind, and according to the report, they put certain "scenarios" in front of you involving your family and loved ones.Dr McCoy EMH: Is there anything specific within any of that that you'd like to talk about? Anything they did that had a more profound effect than other things?Dr McCoy EMH: ::He had found the report very angering. Why in the name of God were these people doing this? What were these people? He could only think about what happened to Dr VanGelder back on Tantalus Colony::Shian Taris: I was talking with Dr. Parvi in my last sessions with him. I just feel like...Shian Taris: ::she was struggling to find the words:: I feel like I was responsible for their deaths.Shian Taris: Like it was my fault that they died. And that was after I recovered my actual memories.Dr McCoy EMH: And you're still fighting these emotions?Shian Taris: ::she hung her head:: And when I look at Brock, I feel as if it's not him I'm seeing. Like I'm being reminded that I'm the one that killed him.Shian Taris: Yes. I want to apologize to Jax. ::she looked up at McCoy. She had no idea if he knew about her connection with her brother or not::Shian Taris: But I can't.Shian Taris: And I don't know how to... fix... for lack of a better word, how I feel about Brock.Shian Taris: Dr. Parvi thought I was making good progress. I'm just not sure.Dr McCoy EMH: Jax is your Brother, ::Nods:: Died in the Dominion war. Do you feel there was something left unsaid with Jax? or like you needed to apologize to him for something?Shian Taris: No, at least not from that point. It's... ::she took a breath:: it's difficult to explain.Shian Taris: Dr. McCoy. I had a special bond with my brother. And, from the time he died until I married Brock, I still talked with him.Shian Taris: ::she looked at him to see what his expression would be::Dr McCoy EMH: ::He perked up a little when she taid she still talked to her brother.:: That's not that unusual, Shian. Does he talk to you?Shian Taris: He did. I used to... I used to see him, talk to him, he talked to me. Brock even saw and spoke with him.Shian Taris: But since we got married, Jax hasn't been back. And after Dr. Parvi worked with me on what had happened versus what I thought had happened, I just feel as if I need to apologize for his death. Even though I know that his actualShian Taris: death wasn't my fault.Dr McCoy EMH: ::Smiles:: You're giving me that "Oh, God Now he's gonna have me committed" look. A lot of people might find that unusual, but let me remind you that I was out there galloping around the GalaxyDr McCoy EMH: for well over 30 years with one crew. I've seen some strange things, Shian. I tend not to write anything off anymore.Dr McCoy EMH: And if Brock spoke with your brother, than either you two have some sort of psychic connection, or you both saw Jax, somehow. Two people can't have the same exact hallucination.Shian Taris: ::she buried her face in her hands. She was confused. She had so many thoughts and paranoid delusions swimming around in her head, she didn't know what to do. She brought her knees up and hugged them to herself, and looked up at Shian Taris: McCoy again::Shian Taris: I want to be able to love my husband, and let him love me, like we used to, without me feeling guilty about what I thought I did to him.Dr McCoy EMH: ::He sat next to her, trying to comfort her.:: I'm sorry Shian. We just have to take this in little bites and not get overwhelmed.Shian Taris: ::her voice was meek and shaky::Dr McCoy EMH: I know that. It's going to just take a litle time, and you will break through this. I Know you love Brock. And Brock knows you love him, and he also knows that they did something to you.Dr McCoy EMH: And Shian, He feels guilty too. As much as you do.Shian Taris: ::her head lifted:: Guilty about what? What does he have to feel guilty about? He didn't let some alien race control him and make him kill me, make him think that he is the one that destroyed everything he loved. ::her confusionShian Taris: and anxiety had briefly turned to anger. Not anger at Brock or McCoy, but anger at herself... anger at the Impostors::Dr McCoy EMH: That's something for you two to discuss when you're ready. I've said too much as it is.Dr McCoy EMH: Tell me what you're angry about right now. I see it in your eyes.Shian Taris: ::she stared for a second:: I'm angry that the Impostors did this to me. I'm angry that they thought they could just toy with lives like they did. And... I'm angry that I couldn't stop them from doing it.Shian Taris: Angry that I couldn't stop them from doing it... to me.Shian Taris: ::then, as if those words were the last of her energy, she put her head back down onto her folded up knees. The tears started.::Dr McCoy EMH: Good. Because this is part of what's at the heart of the matter. I want you to get in touch with your anger, and start to channel it out little by little. We're all angry at what they did, Shian.Dr McCoy EMH: I have plenty of choice words for them myself. Shian Taris: I should have been stronger. I should have been able to hold them off. ::her words were muffled, but still audible::Dr McCoy EMH: Captain Picard said the same thing about his encounter with the Borg. Looks to me like you're in good company.Shian Taris: But I couldn't. ::she lifted her head again:: And I let them make me believe that I killed the only people in this universe that I love. ::she sighed, the tears leaving a wet trail down her cheeks::Dr McCoy EMH: And give yourself a little credit, Shian! They dudn't kill you did they? No! Whatever they did to you, Shian, You, the real Shian Taris is in there, and it was her who allowed you to survive all that!Dr McCoy EMH: Because that part of you is still resisting what they did! All we have to do is break down some walls so the real Shian can come out.Dr McCoy EMH: They hurt you, Shian, But they didn't defeat you! You being here proves that!Dr McCoy EMH: You're a fighter, and you're gonna beat this. And when you feel too tired to fight, you rest and Brock and I will take watch for you.Shian Taris: ::she shook her head:: They didn't defeat me because the war diverted their attention. And then the Federation found me, us. There were over a dozen of us in that hold. They didn't defeat me because I was found by Starfleet.Dr McCoy EMH: ::He decided to stop arguing. he had hoped to channel her anger in the right direction, but that would come. Brock always had a theory about the Impostors, 'maybe he was right', he thought.::Dr McCoy EMH: ::Brock believed that this was not really a "race" Everything about them mimicked them, or a farmiliar species. Maybe they are some kind of humanoid parasitic organism that survivesDr McCoy EMH: by "Becoming" another race. No evidence of an individual identity of this race was found. No Culture. No Art. Maybe they weren't "People" as we think of them.::Dr McCoy EMH: ::They had toyed with this woman's emotions and feelings because they had no concept of what those things were. So they did things to envoke reactons just for the sake of study. Bastards::Shian Taris: ::Shian just stared at a spot on the table next to her, her head laying sideways. She wasn't strong enough.:: Dr McCoy EMH: Tell me about this "Hold" you spoke of. Were you allowed to talk to the others that were there?Shian Taris: ::The hold... he was asking about the hold. She tried to remember.:: Only at first. ::She kept staring at that same spot:: Then we were put into separate rooms. I don't think I saw any of them again until we were on the Titan.Dr McCoy EMH: Shian, are you tired? I know this isn't easy. That's why I just want to take baby steps. If you want, we can either take a break, of pick this up tomorrow. I don't want to push you.Shian Taris: ::She looked up at him:: I am a bit tired, doctor. Maybe if I take a nap and get some rest, I can continue this later on this afternoon. Dr McCoy EMH: That's fine. You need your rest. Also, I'd like to see you with a light exercise regimen to start with. Call me when you want. And I know you don't like to be alone.Shian Taris: ::she nodded to him:: Alright. Could you maybe just stay here until Brock gets back?Shian Taris: Or do you have other appointments to see to?Dr McCoy EMH: Let's see, Alpha shift should be on first lunch in a few minutes. I don't see why not. Could always tell you a story.Shian Taris: ::she had some sort of vague smile as she stood up and walked into the other part of the quarters, unceremoniously falling onto the bed and curling up.:: I'd like to hear one of your stories, Dr. McCoy. Thank you.Dr McCoy EMH: If you can Keep a secret, I know a story or two that are not in the history books.Shian Taris: I won't tell anyone else. ::she laid there, staring at nothing, and listening to Dr. McCoy's voice::Dr McCoy EMH: Ok. Well, ::He began:: We were investigating some sort of temporal distortion. The ship was going through a lot of turbulence, and while treating a patient. I inadvertentlyDr McCoy EMH: gave myself a hypo full of cordrazine.Dr McCoy EMH: The stuff put me in an extremely hyper-paranoid and delusional state. I was convinced everyone wanted to kill me.Dr McCoy EMH: I beamed off the ship, with the crew beaming right after me, and that's when we found something that is still top secret today.Dr McCoy EMH: ::He looked back and forth out of old habit:: We found "The Guardian of Forever"..........***To be continued***
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Post by shian on Jun 25, 2008 21:14:11 GMT -5
Shian Taris: ::Shian rolled over onto her side and simultaneously opened her eyes. She took a moment to get her bearings, then looked around to see who was there with her.::
Dr McCoy EMH: Nobody here but us Holograms. ::McCoy smiled, and took a seat:: Would you like some coffee? Sit for a few minutes brush off the cobwebs before we start again?
Shian Taris: ::She slowly sat up, looked for a chronometer, then looked at McCoy. She was just now recalling what had happened before she fell asleep.::
Shian Taris: No, juice, please. Maybe some pineapple juice. Did Brock come back yet?
Dr McCoy EMH: ::He walks over to the replicator and get the juice, brings it over to her.:: Here you go. Brock is still on the bridge. From what I've heard, We've met a race that seems to thing they're the center of the universe.
Shian Taris: ::She took the glass from him and had a sip.:: Thank you. ::She was still trying to fully wake up.::
Dr McCoy EMH: He'll be along soon enough. Some kind of "Monarch" is coming out to visit the ship. I'm sure glad I don't have to go on first contacts anymore. I think I've had more than my share of those.
Shian Taris: ::A crease formed in her brow.:: Oh? Are they dangerous? ::Her mind was suddenly racing with all the possibilities that presented themselves at this news.::
Dr McCoy EMH: Well, ::He got out a medical tricorder:: Brock doesn't seem to think so. These people are a little behind us in war technology, and we have the Slipstream....
Dr McCoy EMH: If anything happened , they could never catch us.
Shian Taris: ::She set the glass down on the bedside table and swung her legs over the side of the bed.:: Is he sure they're who they say they are?
Dr McCoy EMH: They're not impostors if that's what you're thinking. Just a race of people who seem to have their heads stuck up their own Jeffries tubes, if you catch my drift. Now. Where were we?
Shian Taris: ::Her ears heard him, but her mind was still preoccupied with the possibilities. It was nearly a minute when she finally looked up at him.:: What?
Dr McCoy EMH: I was trying to pick up where we left off. Tell me what you're thnking.
Shian Taris: I don't know. Maybe that they're Impostors, maybe that they are looking for those who were in that hold. Maybe they're after more test subjects. ::Her voice trailed off with a somewhat audible sigh.::
Dr McCoy EMH: Shian, Brock was the one who figured out how to to defeat the impostors. Without their network of bases, Their portal technology became useless. It was Brock himself,
Dr McCoy EMH: Under the Admiral's order who sent the order to the fleet to attack those bases with extreme prejudice. Once they were all taken out, their ship began exploding all over the place.
Dr McCoy EMH: Not only that, Shian, Brock was given command of the Optimus and a commendation for that. And then he recovered this ship. Shian, the Polaris was build to fight those things...
Shian Taris: ::She stood up and walked out into the main area of the quarters, talking as she went.:: Then why didn't the ones keeping me, keeping us in that hold disappear or explode? Why did it take the Titan and her crew to find us and
Shian Taris: rescue us? ::She plopped herself down in a chair, like she was exhausted, even though she'd just woken up from a nap.::
Dr McCoy EMH: ::He turned on a computer screen and pulled up the ship's specs.:: Now I'm no engineer, but look at what this ship has. About 3 times the firepower of a standard Nebula class. The tactical pod alone has six
Dr McCoy EMH: pulse torpedo tubes fore, two aft. and 2 PPC's in fore and one aft. Not to mention 20cm of ablative armor, with a self modulating polarization mode.
Dr McCoy EMH: Even the impostors couldn't transport through that.
Dr McCoy EMH: I'd say you're pretty safe on this ship. As to why there some left. I can't answer that. If there more out there, there can't be very many.
Dr McCoy EMH: And that matter, Brock tells me, is being looked into by some very skilled operatives.
Shian Taris: ::All the specs in the world couldn't make her feel safe right now. And no reassurances would make her feel any better about it. This was one of the bridges she didn't know quite how to cross.::
Shian Taris: ::Learning to trust Brock again when they were alone was one thing. Learning to trust anyone or anything else, even if Brock was directly involved was a completely different story.::
Dr McCoy EMH: I don't think Brock would do anything to put you or this ship at risk. Why don't you put some faith in him? I know that's hard for you right now.
Dr McCoy EMH: ::McCoy had been thinking about different types of treatment. The one he felt would work best would not be a good idea to try.::
Shian Taris: ::She looked at McCoy, her eyes pleading with him.:: How do I do that, though?
Shian Taris: I don't trust my own judgement on anything right now.
Dr McCoy EMH: I understand that, Shian. More than you realize. Many people go through periods of time like that, for whatever circumstances. You know, there was a time, for a while I didn't trust my own judgement any more
Shian Taris: So how do I get past that?
Dr McCoy EMH: than you trust yours right now. Believe me, I understand. Unfortunately, it's not something we can fix with hyposprays and/or surgery.
Shian Taris: Then how do we fix it?
Dr McCoy EMH: You just do. When I was full of doubt, I couldn't afford the luxury of showing that. I was a physician, people depended on me. I was afraid. But when it came time,
Dr McCoy EMH: I did what had to be done. You have to walk through the fear. One baby step at a time.
Shian Taris: ::She sat back in the chair.:: So you're saying I have to take a leap of faith to get this started.
Dr McCoy EMH: Something like that. It gets easier each step of the way.
Dr McCoy EMH: Aren't you even curious about what made me doubt myself?
Shian Taris: ::She looked up at him again, his question bringing her out of her thoughts again.:: I'm sorry, Doctor. Yes, I am, actually.
Dr McCoy EMH: It was a long time ago. we had come back froma five year mission. When I got back to Atlanta, The first thing I did was go see my Father.
Dr McCoy EMH: David McCoy was a tough ornery old son of a b*tch. Feisty as they come. No matter what he went through, he always grit his teeth and bore it. He drove me to be the best
Dr McCoy EMH: doctor I could be. Wouldn't telerate anything but excellence from me. He was a good man and I loved him. Even now a day doesn't go by that I don't think about him.
Shian Taris: ::She made sure she was focused on McCoy's voice, listening to him.::
Dr McCoy EMH: I got to the hospital. He was suffering from a form of polycethemia for which there was no cure. I looked at the indicators on the biobed. His pain levels were
Dr McCoy EMH: trememdous. Nothing we had could stop it for very long. Even the nerve inducers that freeze the pain centers were no longer effective.
Dr McCoy EMH: So there he was. My father. laying there helplessly in great pain. I never saw him that way before. Like this thing had beaten him down. Took away his will.
Dr McCoy EMH: He looked up at me, and just said "Leonard.......please...."
Dr McCoy EMH: I couldn't stand to see him like that. To have to die like that. So I took him off of life support. I had to free him from his pain. ::He teared a little:: I couldn't bear
Dr McCoy EMH: to see him like that. I set him free. ::He pauses a moment.........:: A few months later, they found a cure.
Dr McCoy EMH: When I heard that, I wanted to burn my diploma, to give up medicine altogether. I didn't feel like I was worthy to be a Doctor anymore.
Dr McCoy EMH: ::He sat quitly a moment. still replaying the memory in his mind::
Shian Taris: ::She noted the tears develop and kept watching him.:: But you had no way of knowing that the cure would be found, did you? And did you ever think that he would be able to make it that much longer? Or would it have been
Shian Taris: excruciating for him?
Dr McCoy EMH: I don't know. Maybe he could have held on. maybe not. It's hard to think clearly when it comes to matters of Family. And I should not have treated my own Father.
Dr McCoy EMH: I was able to function as a Doctor again, but that haunted me for many years. Until.......Well, that's a whole other story.
Dr McCoy EMH: What I'm trying to say is that we all have Demons, Shian. Some worse than others. We can hide from them, or we can face them.
Dr McCoy EMH: And with faith, and courage we can beat them. It doesn't happen overnight.
Shian Taris: ::She was hearing the echoing of her thoughts and Brock's words earlier in the doctor's voice now.::
Dr McCoy EMH: What I'd like to do, Shian, and I'll be right by your side, is, we're going to take a short walk every day, or every other day. in a different part of the ship.
Dr McCoy EMH: The more we do that, the more comfortable you'll feel. Just a little each time. I think this is important.
Shian Taris: I realize this, Doctor. I just don't know how to begin. But I can feel that there's a connection with Brock. It's like it's there, but... I don't know... buried.
Dr McCoy EMH: Shian, you have people onthis ship who care a lot about you. I do. Brock, well that goes without saying. Mellisari is very concerned about you, Chief Khambatti, who was a POW of the Impostors cares about you,
Shian Taris: ::She nodded.::
Dr McCoy EMH: Mrs. Musashi, Brock's new Chef cares about you. You have all the support you need. We're not going to let you become a prisoner of your own mind. Because if you do,
Dr McCoy EMH: They will have won. I say we can beat them. I say you can overcome this and free yourself. And if there are any fo those things left out there, We're going to take care of that, too.
Shian Taris: ::Her brow furrowed the slightest bit at the name Mrs. Musashi, having to think about who that was, but then continued on, listening to the doc.::
Dr McCoy EMH: They can't hurt you, Shian. Not anymore. We won't let them. So just a ittle every day, and each time we do that, we beat them a little more.
Shian Taris: ::She nodded again, wondering if this would work, yet starting to think that maybe she might actually be able to do it.::
Shian Taris: Alright. I guess it can't hurt much more to try.
Dr McCoy EMH: Of course it can't. ::He smiles:: Now is there anything in particular you'd like to see? I can't take you to the Arboretum just yet, because Brock wants to take you there himself.
Shian Taris: ::Her face suddenly broke into a light smile.:: I know. I'm sure he's told you that he proposed to me in the arboretum on Concord. ::This is a memory that she could recall and one that she had started to cling to in her last
Shian Taris: couple of weeks on Starbase 173. It was a time she truly loved.::
Shian Taris: I guess we could start, maybe, in the hydroponics bay. ::It was as good a place as any that she could think of.::
Dr McCoy EMH: Alrighty! Hydroponics it is! ::He smiled and put his arm out so she could hold on to it.::
Shian Taris: ::She didn't know how she was going to handle going out of quarters again, but she said she'd try. She took McCoy's arm as she stood up.:: Will we be back in time for Brock to be back? I don't want him to think I went
Shian Taris: missing again.
Dr McCoy EMH: I'm sure we will. If not, he can track us down pretty easily.
Shian Taris: Alright ::she gave a bit of a sigh as she began walking with him out the door of the quarters.::
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Post by shian on Jun 29, 2008 12:07:31 GMT -5
::Shian returned from her walk with Dr. McCoy and entered the empty quarters.::
Dr. McCoy? Thank you for your time this morning. I really do appreciate it. And, for some reason, I guess I don't feel as anxious when I talk with you.
::She sat down in a chair and looked around.::
Hopefully Brock will be back soon.
::She realized that she'd come to know that Brock was the only familiar face she yearned to see after all these times of trying to be "brave".::
::The walk to the hydroponics bay wasn't too bad, though. Mostly because Dr. McCoy kept her close and kept her talking. The more engaged she was in a conversation, the less she noticed the outside environment. And the less she noticed that, the less nervous she was.::
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Post by Dr Leonard McCoy EMH on Jun 29, 2008 16:01:27 GMT -5
Thank you, Shian. ::McCoy stood in the doorway.:: I'm glad you feel comfortable with me. It'll make things a lot easier. Just one queston though. ::He smiled::
Where the hell were all the pretty girls like you to say that to me when I was still alive? ::Laughs::
::He saw Brock coming down the corridor with a tray::
And I think lunch is served. I'll let you kids visit. Shian, you call me if you need anything.
::McCoy smiled at Brock and nodded and then headed down the corridor himself to get back to sickbay::
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Post by Fleet Captain Brock Dantara on Jun 29, 2008 20:48:25 GMT -5
Thank you for everything, Doctor.
::Brock smiled as he brought the tray into their quarters.::
How did everrything go? ::He put the tray down on the table::
I just put something simple together. Chef salad made with fresh vegetables grown onboard. The cold cuts are fresh too. we keep a lot of that in transporter stasis like I used to do with food back on the Concord.
And let's see, Orange juice, rigellian springwater, some fresh Kava fruit. You know, I was thinking about trying my hand at making springwine. Hopefully it will taste better than my engine room hootch.
::He smiled as he put out the food::
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Post by shian on Jun 29, 2008 23:47:27 GMT -5
::Shian smiled to the doctor, feeling a bit flushed at his question. But she nodded to him, as he was getting ready to leave.::
Thank you again, Dr. McCoy. And I will.
::Her last statement in response to his parting words, she saw Brock enter with the tray of food. She felt something. She couldn't tell if it was from the pit of her stomach or her heart, but it was definitely due to seeing her husband. And she knew that had to be a positive sign, at least.::
That sounds wonderful, Brock. And I think you should try making the springwine. I never had your.... hooch did you call it?
::She inhaled and then exhaled fully.::
As for things with Dr. McCoy, I think they went well. I got some things out in the open. And, we actually just got back from a walk to the hydroponics bay. I even had a little nap in between our talks, here, in quarters, and he stayed while I was asleep.
I like the fact that I can feel safe around him. I felt safe with Dr. Parvi, too. But, between you and me, Dr. McCoy is a lot more personable.
::She liked Dr. Parvi, and he was always understanding and compassionate with her, but Dr. McCoy was even more so, and just the way he talked, it nearly made him seem even more human than Dr. Parvi. She almost wished she'd known the real Dr. McCoy when he was alive.::
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Post by Fleet Captain Brock Dantara on Jun 30, 2008 21:27:35 GMT -5
::He took himself some salad, and poured water for the two of them.::
Since the Early 20th century on Earth, maybe even further back then that, navy ship engineers used to make engine room hootch.
It's illegal, but it's a tradition. Scotty was well known for his hootch. He used to tell me how everytime an Admiral came aboard, the first thing they asked was "Where's the hootch?"
He taught me to make it the way he does, but Scotty's shoes are hard to fill. He left me a couple bottles when he was on board a while back. When you're feeling up to it, we'll enjoy some together. Just be prepared to punch a bulkhead to keep it down!
::Laughs::
I'm really glad things are going well with you and the Doctor. I think it's great that you went to the hydroponics bay. I hope you enjoyed that.
I'm also hoping that we finish this mission, maybe we can visit the arboretum. It puts the Concord's arboretum to shame. I'm looking forward to enjoying it for the first time all over again with you. We'll go at the least busy time.
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Post by shian on Jun 30, 2008 21:52:30 GMT -5
::Shian put some salad on a plate, then added some kava. She picked up the glass of water that Brock poured for her and took a drink. She listened to his story of Scotty and the origins of the "engine room hooch".::
We'll see. ::She smiled.:: I'm not big on drinking, really. But, I'd be glad to share a drink with you. I know that engineering is where your heart is on a ship. And I know how much Mr. Scott means to you.
::There were many pieces of her past with Brock that she could remember clearly. But at times it seemed like it was another life altogether. One that wasn't hers. She hoped that these feelings would eventually fade.::
::She took a few bites of salad, enjoying the crispness of the fresh vegetables. Brock had indeed made sure that the food supply on Polaris was among the very best in Starfleet.::
I look forward to going to the arboretum with you. Dr. McCoy has suggested we take short trips to various places around the ship every day. We'll see how that goes. Today wasn't bad.
::She decided to broach the subject of the current mission, since he had now mentioned it.::
I have heard a little from the doctor about this mission you're on. And... it scares me a bit. How can you be positive that these people are what they say they are?
::She really didn't want to tell him straight out that she feared they might be Impostors. She took a few more bites of her salad.::
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Post by Fleet Captain Brock Dantara on Jun 30, 2008 22:19:56 GMT -5
::Brock began digging onto his own salad.::
Scotty means a lot to a lot of people. You should have seen when he encountered McCoy.
::Smiles thinking about it::
We got him a ship for his Birthday.
::When she asked the question concerning the mission, he knew she was thinking of the impostors. He wanted to tell her that he knew where the raining few were hiding, but that would only frighten her and be counterproductive.::
Oh they're who they say they are alright. We're going to meet the other race shortly. This is no ordinary war between two planets fought for the usual reasons. This war is.........stupid.
And I can't for the life of me figure out how a civilization can be technologically adbvanced as these people, yet still have their heads up their own Jeffries tubes.
I know why this war is being fought. I just haven't figured out how I'm going to stop it. I'll be meeting with the leader of the Kuallan government later today. We'll see what happens then.
Maybe I can get them to sit down at the table and talk. Who knows?
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